Going Out to Eat with Food Allergies

Spontaneity goes out the window when you are allergic to foods.  So what does it take to go out to dinner or any meal when you have strict diet? Not much, frankly. But planning and calling ahead is key. Most people do not understand allergies, so a little explaining goes a long way.

Jahan, in your second year of life you have now decided to actually try pizza and you decided that you like it, (imagine that), well love it, we are venturing out to a local pizza spot. Taking a one and two year old out to dinner is a whole other adventure, but we are doing that too.

So what does it take?  So first off,  I found a restaurant that is "allergy-friendly" - they understand allergies (sort of) and offer items that are friendly, usually gluten-free (GF) and/or exclude the top 8 allergens (wheat, soy, eggs, dairy, nuts, peanuts, fish and shellfish).  Next, I call them during non-peak times. 2pm is a good time. I ask for the manager. I explain your allergies, what I would like for you to eat and ask for them to read the ingredients to me off every single item you will be consuming or offered.  After ensuring all ingredients will be safe, then comes the risk of cross-contamination. That means that other items that may have touched items you are allergic to then comes in contact with your food. For example, a spoon. Or butter that a utensil went into that previously touched wheat for example. None of that can happen - big no no, since we already know you have reacted this way.  Okay, so by now, the manager is either completely freaked out and tells me he/she cannot guarantee safety OR the manager is willing to accommodate and guaranteeing safety.  We like safety. Anything other than 100% is no go for us.   If safety is guaranteed, I tell the manager my name, when we are coming and that's it. Then when we arrive at the restaurant, I ask for the manager and all communications and expectations are set. I literally do this for EVERY SINGLE RESTAURANT. EVERY TIME. EVERY TIME WE TRAVEL. We have to live and venture out and explore the world. We will NOT put you in a bubble, so we take risks. We mitigate these risks as best we can, the only way we know how.

Cheers to pizza...and hopefully wine for mommy!

The Cost of Allergies - Uncle Sam Give Me a Break!

As your mom - I manage most of your health and so I know how expensive all this can be and those costs can add up really quickly, and we have reasonable health insurance. 

From the steep $600+ for an Epi-pen to thousands of dollars each month on food suitable for your long list of allergies and doctor appointment visits to ambulance rides and hospital stays. The costs are high and climbing.  Since I am a CPA, I often get questioned on taxes and credits, etc. The short answer is, I have no idea about taxes! Well I know enough to be dangerous and hold a conversation at a cocktail party. But this got me thinking, are any of the costs related to your allergies deductible?

I did some digging and the answer is Yes! And no.

First, what can we deduct:

• Co-pays
• Transportation costs, including mileage, using the standard mileage rate
• Parking 
• Overnight stays
• FOOD!

Yes, you read that right. The costs of special food can be deductible. The food must meet certain criteria. Those criteria include:

• The food must not be used to satisfy normal nutritional needs;
• The food must alleviate or treat an illness; and
• The need for the food must be substantiated by a physician

"The amount you can deduct as a medical expense is limited to the amount by which the cost of the special food exceeds the cost of a normal diet.  So, for example, if you buy special flour that costs $7/bag because of a wheat allergy and regular flour is $5/bag, you can only include the difference ($2) for purposes of calculating the deduction.  In other words, you cannot deduct the cost of all of your special food; you can only deduct the difference between the cost of your special food and your "normal" food.  If there is no such "normal" equivalent, however, the entire cost of the product is deductible."

Keep records to substantiate the claims. The expenses may be subject to phase outs, eligibility requirements and other limitations and we can only deduct those expenses which exceed 10% of our adjusted gross income (AGI).

What you cannot deduct:

• OTC medicines, even if doctor recommended, example: Motrin
• Non-prescription based personal care products, example: oatmeal bath, creams

The big take-away here is to track all of our expenses all year and if we meet the 10% floor of our AGI, we can start deducting. 

A Glimpse into 2020

With the boys' school closed today, we opted to make great use of our time together and explore the local area.  First up, a farm. Pony ride, check. Petting zoo, check. Goat feeding, check. Now time for lunch. Jahan plowed thru his sandwich and fruit, the sun amps up his appetite for some reason.




After lunch, we hopped into the car to pay a visit to this restaurant I have been wanting to try for sometime. It's called One Dish Cuisine. The restaurant prides itself in being very allergen friendly and free of most things that could send Jahan into an allergic tailspin.

We pulled up and went inside and were greeted by the owner. After a short intro, I learned that his wife has many food allergies and he was inspired to create an atmosphere for people like Jahan, to eat safely. Freely. And be a normal kid and eat a damn cupcake or a cookie or both.

Jahan asked for a chocolate cupcake. This was a first, not the cupcake part because I cook and bake all sorts of things at home, but the part about ordering dessert in a restaurant and eating it at a table in the restaurant. Seems basic for most, but not for Jahan.  We all sat down as I placed the chocolate cupcake in front of Jahan. I smiled, watched and waited with joy and my camera of course. Jahan still is unaware of how his allergies impact him, so this moment really was for me. Jahan removed the frosting and ate one-third of the cake - then he was done.  The freedom I felt in not having to ask one question about what was in that cupcake, what is the risk of cross-contamination, what are the "natural flavors" was indescribable  - to my surprise, that is all I really got from this moment. There was no extreme exhilaration as I thought there would be. Jahan is not a "foodie" by any means. His appetite is very small, so he did not show the excitement I was expecting even when eating the cupcake. He just doesn't really care about food or even sweets. In a big way, this makes dealing with his allergies much easier.  The joy I was expecting will only come when I see Jahan excited with glee, usually while he is playing soccer or trucks with his brother or at the beach with friends or a backyard barbecue with a slip-n-slide.  Fun>food.

Jahan removed the frosting - his least favorite part

Jahan all finished with his cake

This moment let me take a glimpse into our future and feel what that freedom will be like when Jahan is completely cured, yes I said cured of his food allergies.  

The Scratch that Itches and the Itch that Scratches

Jahan's eczema at seven months old

The correlation between eczema and food allergies although undeniable, is often not common knowledge to all.  Jahan's food allergy journey began shortly after birth with full body eczema covering his tiny body by five months old. Weeping, bleeding, itching, repeat. It's the scratch that itches and the itch that scratches.  We have had ups and downs, learning a lot along the way, but around the age of 14 months old, Jahan's baby skin was finally just that, soft and supple, like it's supposed to be.

This lasted for six short months and then a chest to knee flare began. Wet-wraps, diet revisions, elimination diets, creams and ultimately steroids. Ugh, that feels like the ultimate fail, having to resort to god awful steroids on my toddler's young and still thin skin.  All to end up back with an unwavering flare.  We opted to see our functional doctor, think east meets west, a holistic, natural MD.  The marriage of the two had produced some amazing results in the past, so I thought, lets get in to see Dr. Wong.

As we meet with Dr. Wong, Jahan is fearful, he must be thinking what will this doctor do to me. He has seen more doctors in his short two years of life than I have in my 32 years.

Right away Dr. Wong takes a look at the eczema and then scans Jahan's tongue and suggests eliminating cow diary. That's all milk, cheese, yogurt, mac n' cheese, string cheese, pirates booty, milk chocolate and the list goes on. We will switch to goat dairy, no problem since we live in an area where we have access to these foods and Amazon basically delivers same day now.  Dr. Wong also reminds us that Jahan's eczema is his body's way of showing the internal inflammation and suggests we complete a stool sample to see inside of his gut, where two-thirds of his immune system lives.  We agree.  Then Wong as Jahan calls him tells me that I have to prepare the samples at home, FedEx them overnight to the lab and wait.

Eczema flare at 22 months old before dairy elimination

So off we go.  Waiting for Jahan to have a bowel movement was our next step, which thankfully was only the next day (Saturday).  Jahan does his business and quickly I start in on this home scientific lab.  This was not fun.  Spooning fecal matter into various tubes, mixing and smoothing, repeat. They should really consider sending a mask home with this sample kit.  Not one of my finer mothering moments, but someone had to do it.

I package it up and off the stool goes to the lab for testing.

The results are in and right away from them I can see there are issues that need to be addressed. Inflammation. Leaky gut. Dysbiosis. Minimal bacterial diversity. And worst of all, two pathogens. Shit, how did this happen to my little guy? He was born vaginally, solely breastfed for 6 months, no antibiotics for the first year of life, probiotics from birth. He's only two!

Jahan's eczema and gut resolution regimen 

We circle back with Dr. Wong and he confirms everything from above.  Mehul and I are not interested in putting a "band-aid" on Jahan's symptoms, we want to solve the problems at the root. Wong knows this. He works to find "safe" supplements for Jahan's issues. This is quite the task given all of his food allergies, but ultimately we go home with our list of supplements and prescription to remove all dairy, even goat. So now Jahan is dairy free and ingesting 11 vitamins, supplements and herbs multiple times daily in hopes to improve the gut.

With this routine, the eczema has dissipated entirely with the exception of one stubborn patch.

And now we will continue the routine for eight weeks and then I get to spoon, smooth and smell the fecal matter of my adorable two-year old....again all while hoping we can stabilize Jahan's gut and entirely eradicate the scratch that itches and the itch that scratches.